As the third and final season of Adulting nears its conclusion next month, Thembinkosi Mthembu’s portrayal of Bonga Tembe reaches its emotional peak.
The 2024 SAFTA Best Actor winner and Hunk of the Year Feather Award winner plays a married man eager to start a family and build a bright future with his wife, Nkanyezi (played by Londeka Sishi).
Bonga, a character who has grown through his experiences in marriage, infidelity, and personal growth, has been at the centre of the show’s exploration of toxic masculinity, emotional vulnerability, and the complexities of modern relationships.
In their early days of marriage, Bonga and Nkanyezi quickly realise that their family values aren’t as aligned as they thought. Bonga is eager to start a family right away, while Nkanyezi is focused on advancing her career for the next five years. Their differing goals create tension, raising the question: Was Bonga ever truly ready for marriage?
Bonga and Nkanyezi’s current problem highlights a lack of communication and selfishness. Bonga wants to start a family quickly, driven by the influence of his absent father. He desperately wants to prove he can be a great man and father. However, when Bonga and Nkanyezi decided to marry, they didn’t have a clear conversation about their expectations regarding starting a family. Had they communicated better, they might have avoided the mess they’re now in. Instead, they find themselves on a path toward disappointment and bitterness.
Additionally, Bonga thought that marriage would help him change his infidelity tendencies, but miscommunication with Nkanyezi has only pushed him back into old habits.
When asked about how his own marriage influenced his portrayal of Bonga’s relationship, Thembinkosi shared that real-life communication and balance played key roles. In a marriage, both partners need to support each other to ensure a healthy relationship. He noted that his wife played a huge role in helping him prepare for this role, assisting with lines and helping him gauge how certain words would land in a real relationship.
Thembinkosi also offered advice based on both his personal experience and playing Bonga. To men, he advised taking things one step at a time, especially given the immense pressures many men face today. He emphasised the importance of moving away from societal pressures and returning to simpler values, like those his father lived by.
To women, he suggested being kind and not generalising men based on negative past experiences. He also highlighted the importance of not staying in relationships for material benefits and taking breaks from social media to protect mental health.
One of the most intriguing aspects of Bonga’s character, according to Thembinkosi, is his focus on family. Although this has been a constant drive for him, his communication and ego remain challenges. Bonga is driven by career success but struggles to balance this with his family life.
Thembinkosi also touched on Bonga’s complex relationship with his friend Vuyani. Bonga sees potential in him but is frustrated by what he perceives as Vuyani’s lack of seriousness about his future. Bonga wants Vuyani to step up, take responsibility, and grow, which sometimes manifests as tough love. There’s also an element of competition between them, with Vuyani wanting to be like Bonga, while Bonga constantly reminds him he’s not yet on his level.
Bonga confides in Mpho, despite their differences, because Mpho represents the stable family life Bonga desires. Although Mpho is divorced, Bonga admires his love for his children and the lessons Mpho’s been through in marriage. Mpho’s example inspires Bonga, and he values his advice.
When Thembinkosi learned that Adulting would be ending with this season, he was at the office, where they were informed of the final direction of the storyline.
While it was bittersweet, he expressed excitement about going out on a high note, saying, “Ingoma siyi vala kusasmnandi” – leaving the story while it’s still hot.
He believes that, despite the show’s end, the strong chemistry and work ethic among the cast mean they’ll work together again in the future.
Main Image: Supplied
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